Oh, To Know It All!

Parenting is a learning experience. We learn from our children. And if we're lucky, they learn from us...eventually.

Take for example, the word "poop." Several months ago, Rachel spent a week with Rebecca when she provided home daycare for two young children for a week. The little boy was obsessed with the word "poop." Of all the things Rachel could have fixated on, this is the one she chose. While part of me is glad I have a progeny to carry on our long family history of bathroom humor, I'm not sure I'm happy my daughter will carry on the legacy.

Even so, she manages to educate me. The other day, she was peeling a banana. Not a stubby banana suitable for someone her size, but one almost as long as her head. As she peeled each section to reveal the banana, she handed them to me because we cannot expect her to walk alllll the way to the trash can to throw them away. Then she removed the bottom piece of the banana that you never eat. She handed it to me and said, "Here's the banana poop."

Since I had previously viewed bananas as devoid of digestive systems, I was a bit taken aback. But from an almost four-year-old's perspective, I suppose it makes sense.

And as she develops more of an imagination, she also has displayed alter egos. Sometimes, she is Jeff from the Wiggles. She finds it hilarious how Jeff mugs to the camera and unlike her unfortunately, can fall asleep at a moment's notice. I don't think she understood my explanation of narcolepsy at all.

But she has another alter ego named "Pootie." It's said with a teasing tone, as if she knows she shouldn't say it, but just can't resist. I've decided to ride with "Pootie", not only because I think she'll outgrow it eventually, but also because it's sweeter than the alternative, "Fartblossom."

Rachel has also grown more defiant as she gets older. Her favorite phrase right now is the less than endearing, "You are wrong!" Often it is accompanied by an accusatory pointed index finger or crossed arms, pouted lips and chin thrust into the air with implied superiority. Even when we took an online quiz about the PBS show Arthur, when I chose the wrong multiple choice and saw a big X and heard a buzzer as I was informed I made the wrong choice, Rachel turned around, arms crossed and chin thrust into the air and echoed "You were wrong!" There is nothing like having the next generation label you a dumbass. I thought I had at least until the teenaged years to experience that.

Anyhow, the other day, my angry daughter turned around and told me "You was wrong!" I don't even remember what it was about.

I thought I'd turn it into a teaching exercise. "No, honey. You were wrong."

"I wasn't wrong! You was wrong!"

Laughing I said, "No sweetie. I'm not talking about who was wrong! I'm talking gramatically.
It's 'you were wrong, not you was wrong!'"

Exasperated, she replied, "No! I wasn't wrong! You was wrong!"

I suppose four years old is a bit early to teach grammar. Still, it's no reason to act like a poopiehead!