WEP

As in well-established personality. It's one of our nicknames for our little lady as she approaches four. For an analogy, I used to tell my mom that I was her little angel and she would respond, "Your halo is choking you!" Heredity has passed that trait along.

As I lay on the couch last night, with my broken ankle elevated, watching a tv show, Rachel suggested I move to her bedroom so she could watch her video in the living room. Pointing to me and scowling, she informed me, "I'm number one! You're number two!"

Needless to say, we are trying to teach our little lady that in real life, we are not always number one. As we teach her Nietzsche and Proust and the great philosophers, we will also teach her Jagger. "You can't always get what you want." Or as mommy and daddy say under their breaths, "Geez, stop acting like such a little shit."

We already see signs of selective hearing, imagined slights, significant parts of stories left out or exaggerated. Yes, our daughter is sugar and spice and everything nice. She is also dramatic pout, downturned mouth and jutted out lip. More and more, it looks like acting may be her chosen profession.

After all, Rachel shows no shyness around microphones. The other day, her school put on its annual Thanksgiving pageant. Kids that age are adorable. Some ham it up, even at a Jewish school! Others shout and wave at their daddies.

Afterwards, parents sat with their kids for lunch. I sat with Rachel and the Busy Bees. My wife sat with the class she teaches, the Butterflies. At one point, I noticed Rachel was missing. I checked the first option, the dessert table. Then I realized, she had walked back on stage and toward the microphone, which was still on. I grinned from ear to ear. I couldn't wait to hear what she was going to say. As soon as my wife saw her, she looked mortified and started charging toward the stage. As Rachel got everyone's attention, she said, "Thank you for coming. Have fun!" Or perhaps it was "Hope you have fun! Thank you" At any rate, it was inocuous and much more tame than what I imagined she might say. Even though we dragged her off the stage, she returned twice just to hear the sound of her voice.

The next day, we were at the Pancake House and Rachel found the microphone behind the waitress stand and said, "Hello" to the entire restaurant before she was dragged away, screaming and crying.

Then the other day, my wife and other members of the Temple were at Barnes & Noble to hear a woman who sang at the Temple the night before. Rachel was there too. At one point, she looked up and saw one of the rabbis and then told my wife in what I'm told is an extremely loud voice, "Hey, mommy! It's your boss!"

The singer then called all the children around her during the performance. In every break between songs, Rachel tried to engage her in conversation. I'm told she danced to the music too and since her pants were too big, they tended to slip down and show her Minnie Mouse panties.

Eventually, she'll learn there is a reason we have two ears and one mouth. But I hope she never loses her outspokeness. It's entertaining. Just don't tell her I said so.