Snooze Blues

Rachel starts kindergarten at her new school one week from today. And that's a problem.

Rachel needs to go to bed earlier. And she refuses.

Last Thursday night, my wife and I had an actual Bill Withers/Grover Washington, Jr. date! Just the Two of Us. We dined at a Japanese Steakhouse. We took in the new Batman movie. It was around midnight as we approached the sitter's apartment complex.

"Think she's awake?" I asked my better half.

"Oh yeah!" Rebecca replied. "She is excited to be around Lily."

"No way," I replied. "I think she's asleep."

Wifey was right. Lily looked tired. Rachel had enough energy to hit the party circuit with Lindsay Lohan. "We played Life" she told us excitedly. "I want to play it again!"

All those books that say kids need 12-14 hours sleep? Someone forgot to tell our daughter. She fights sleep like it's a 15-round title fight. She's like a Jack-In-the-Box with a broken spring. No matter how many times you think you have the lid slammed shut, it manages to spring open again.

Frankly, we're worried. Her new school is not around the corner. It is a 40-minute to an hour drive from here. Rachel is going to need to be up and out the door by 6:30 a.m. We'd like her to remember the kindergarten year. We'd like her to stay in bed at night so we can go to bed.

The other night, we had her in bed by 8:30 p.m. She finally stopped getting out three hours later. We've massaged her legs, blown on her neck and brushed her hair by her ears. We'll think all is good, until we hear John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt being belted out of her bedroom like she's fronting a heavy-metal band.

"I needed to go to the bathrooooom!" (You must have the prostate of a 70-year-old.)

"I can't fall asleep!" (Really, you were in there a whole fifteen seconds!)

"I want you in there with me." (And then you'll talk to me the whole time.)

"I'm hungry!" (Wow, I never knew hungry had four syllables.)

"Go to bed, Rachel! I don't want to have to tell you again!"
"You don't love me!" (Soon to be on the Cartoon Network- Master Manipulator-The Early Years.

"I'm worried about the direction the country is going." (Not yet, but just you wait!)

Eventually, the problem will work itself out. School will exhaust her. She'll fall asleep more easily. I'll miss walking in from work and seeing her smiling face waiting for me when the door opens. And I may even miss having her wake me up every thirty minutes after I get home because a) she wants to play, b) she is hungry and will eat only two bites of whatever I make her, c) she's bored d) she wants to play on the computer or e) She wants to play, is hungry and will eat only two bites of whatever I make her, is bored and wants to play on the computer.

All I can say is, "Can I have some of that energy?"