SpongeBob Questions

Last week, Rebecca dropped Rachel by my office. I was to keep her entertained for about 45 minutes before dropping her off for a playdate.

I got Rachel settled in at my desk and logged on to PBSkids.com. The newsroom was quite relaxed, because both the news director and managing editor were out of town.

Reporter Jerry Carnes and photojournalist John Samuels were among the people who stop by to see Rachel. Jerry has three children much older than Rachel and started talking to her about Spongebob Squarepants. It seems that Jerry has done a lot of thinking.

He asked Rachel why there is a beach in Bikini Bottom when they are already underwater. He mentioned the fact that SpongeBob can't swim, but he is a sponge and could float anyway. He pondered why Larry the Lobster was the lifeguard and why a lifeguard was even needed underwater. And why does Spongebob have two teeth?

"Don't forget the squirrel," I added.

"Yeah, what is the deal with the squirrel?" Jerry asked. "What is SHE doing down there?"

Rachel looked at Jerry as if to say, "Who are you and why are you asking me these questions?"

Not long after that, we got in my car to drive over to the Temple, where Rachel was to be picked up for her playdate.

As we buckled our seatbelts, I said, "You know, Rachel, Jerry brought up a lot of good questions."

To which Rachel replied in an almost exasperated tone, "Dad! It's a cartoon. IT'S NOT REAL!"